What do you feed your dog?

How can I feed the dog which brings life, health, righteousness, and joy?  This thought has been percolating in my mind ever since Sunday’s message regarding renewing our minds.  I put my ipod on this morning to listen to while vacuuming, and what song do you suppose was playing?  “Think on These Things” by Petra.  So, as I sucked up dust bunnies, toast crumbs, and dirt from muddy shoes, I heard “...there’s a danger waiting - thoughts held in captivity.  The vain imaginations that long to be set free – I hold the key, with thoughts of purity.  Whatever things are pure and true, I want to think on these things.”  It is songs like these, inspired by scripture (Philippians 4:8) that help me feed the dog that I want to win!  What I’ve been telling my son is a truth of life found in the Bible – your attitude makes all the difference!  What are the thoughts that I need to take captive, and which thoughts do I need to consciously dwell upon?  What about critical, negative thoughts about my spouse?  Have you ever been out with a group of women friends, and had the conversation turn to complaining about husbands?  Sometimes it is in jest, but the things we laugh at say a lot about our own minds and our own thinking!  Why is it so much easier to complain than to encourage and uplift?  Maybe it’s because it’s not as funny to say, “You know, my husband is not perfect, but he is really a great father – he loves the kids and spends as much time with them as he can,” than to say, “You should see the state of the house when my husband stays home for a day!”  Gordon Necemer in his Sunday School class yesterday made a comment about what a privilege it is to give a portion of the earnings God has blessed him with to the government, so that they can provide police, fire fighters, medical care, well-tended roads, parks, community programs, etc.  When’s the last time you heard an attitude like that about income tax?!  It certainly challenged me – it’s so easy to fall into ‘worldly’ attitudes towards taxes – give as little as possible, and complain as much as possible about it!   “Do not conform yourselves to the standards of this world, but let God transform you inwardly by a complete change of your mind.”  Romans 12:2 (Good News translation).  Where in your life, in your daily tasks, do you need a complete change of your mind?  In your attitude towards a teacher?  A coach?  A doctor?  A co-worker?  Perhaps towards another follower of Christ?  This morning in my devotions I read a quote that said, “Religion can provide a way to avoid the harsh facts of our experience, or it can be a means of living into the unpleasant actuality with reasonable hope.”  It’s a matter of attitude – of conforming our minds to think on what is right, pure, true, noble, lovely, and honourable, giving us hope, rather than a means of escape.  God calls us to change the way we think about life, about our experiences - to think with hope, because he wants to give us abundant life, here and now.  That’s how I can feed the dog I want to win – the dog which brings life.

Seasons change - God is constant

No matter how old you are, sometimes you just don't feel "mature" enough to handle things. I look in the mirror, and it doesn't lie about my age, but somehow I just feel like I'm still 29. You always hear the statement, "Where has the time gone?" or "I don't feel my age". Believe me somedays I do feel my age, but in my head I rarely feel the maturity of a 47 year old. I can remember when I was in my 20's and thinking how old I would be when we welcome in the new millenium. I calculated I'd be 35. Wow, I thought, I'd be "pretty old" and I wondered how I would behave, feel, matured at that age. I have to honestly say, I feel no different then as now except to say I have had more life experiences now and have seen the beauty of watching our children grow and blossom into adulthood. This journey of watching how God can use our children to train, guide, develop them into the people he had planned them to be is marvelous. My husband and I continually look at each other and say not by our might, but by yours Lord. We are amazed and grateful for the journey He has taken us on and continues to take us on. Our daughter is in her 3rd year of university and growing in her faith in amazing ways. She is teaching and inspiring us now (a little role reversal). It is quite amazing to look back and see how the role of mother changes as our children grow up. I know people always say "they grow up so fast" and really they do. Their growth is a reminder of our growth. Their aging reminds us of our aging. Their experiences remind us of our experiences. I feel like I should still be in the Moms and Tots program at church and feel somewhat disconnected from that group of young moms and my mind can't get around why that is. Surely, I can make more of an effort to get connected but the appropriate word is "effort". I didn't need to make an effort when I had small children. It came more natural to talk about baby things when you had babies and the struggles associated with that. Don't get me wrong, I love the stage of life I'm at right now. The kids are very independent although still require me for certain things. I really can't put my finger on the moment when the changes occur when your children grow up. On one hand, I say it happens so quickly and on the other it's gradual. It's like watching the clock and not being able to see the hands moving, but they do. It's like watching the sunset, you can't see it moving when you stare at it but before you know it, it's behind the horizon. Children are like this too. Perhaps the only way you can see the growth is through photos and when they outgrow their clothing. It happens gradually, yet quickly. Through this I've learned to enjoy every moment...good with the bad. I've learned there is always opportunity to love your children. Even during those times when you are pushed to your limit. And believe me, you do need time away too. As our daughter is now living on campus, we don't see much of her. But the times we see her, oh what joy we have with one another. We enjoy the silly little things we took for granted when we saw each other all the time. Our son is in grade 11 and quite independent from us as well. The times we can sit and talk are few but when we do, oh what a blessing to see the Lord working in his life and growing him to be the man He intended him to be. Still I feel like I'm not equipped to be a mother of a 21 year old and a 16 year old and yet I am and God is walking with me daily, by my side, cheering me on saying " You can do it...you are doing it!!!" Relying on my Lord is my strength . Knowing He is the one who protects and watches over my kids when I'm not there is the security and comfort I depend on.      

Christmas Love

Christmas is almost here. What does that mean for all us mom's out there?

We all have different traditions, responsibilities and ways of celebrating but there are also a lot of common denominators when it comes to being a mom during this busy holiday season. You might be baking yourself into a frazzled frenzy (or maybe you're baking took place earlier this month), preparing grocery lists for last minute gifts and turkey dinners and likely wishing you had hired a maid for all the cleaning required if you are having company over. Chances are you will be up late wrapping presents on the 24th when you should be sleeping... only to be waken up far too early by little ones (or not so little ones) wanting to open their presents.

The list of things to get done at Christmas time is always the same from year to year but this year as my children begin to get a bit older I found myself thinking about what I wanted this special time of year to look like for my family. What I wanted to teach my children (or not teach my children for that matter) about what it really means to celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ our Lord and Saviour. So this year we have started some new traditions. Every day in December before my kids open their advent calendars we read some verses relating to the Christmas Story. Then I have my children answer questions about what we read. At bed time we have been reading "One Wintry Night" by Ruth Bell Graham which tells the Story of Christ's birth... beginning with the reason we needed a Saviour to begin with. During the day I am doing my best to give me family gifts. Not presents to be unwrapped each day but the gifts God has given us... gifts of HOPE, PEACE, JOY, LOVE and FAITH.

I wish you ALL a very Merry Christmas as you share God's love with your families this holiday season and with the world.

I recently came across this modification of 1 Corinthians 13 and thought it was something that would be nice to share with the Mom's of Bethany...

1 Corinthians 13 – a Christmas Version

"IF I decorate my house perfectly with plaid bows, strands of twinkling lights and shiny balls, but do not show love to my family, I’m just another decorator.

IF I slave away in the kitchen, baking dozens of Christmas cookies, preparing gourmet meals and arranging a beautifully adorned table at mealtime, but do not show love to my family, I’m just another cook.

IF I work at the soup kitchen, carol in the nursing home and give all that I have to charity, but do not show love to my family, it profits me nothing.

IF I trim the spruce with shimmering angels and crocheted snowflakes, attend a myriad of holiday parties and sing in the choir’s cantata but do not focus on Christ, I have missed the point.

LOVE stops the cooking to hug the child. Love sets aside the decorating to kiss the husband. Love is kind, though harried and tired. Love doesn’t envy another’s home that has coordinated Christmas china and table linens.

LOVE doesn’t yell at the kids to get out of the way, but is thankful they are there to be in the way. Love doesn’t give only to those who are able to give in return but rejoices in giving to those who can’t.

LOVE bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails. Video games will break, pearl necklaces will be lost, golf clubs will rust, but giving the gift of love will endure."

Know-it-all (everything I need to know I haven't learned yet)

Back when I was in my post secondary education I had a conversation with one of my teachers about when you know it all.

He said “you know what happens when you stop learning?”

I said, “you know it all?”

“nope, you’re dead” he replied dryly.

I was basically struck dumb. I had never thought of it that way. It’s not that I thought you could stop learning at some point or that you would reach a time where you’d know it all. I just never gave it much thought.

I don’t know what exactly caused me to rekindle this train of thought, I suppose I was pondering over the lessons I was trying to teach my children that day (or more truthfully the lessons they’d taught me). You see the older I get and the longer I am a mom the more I realize I don’t know it all. You read the latest books written by well known child psychologists or the hippest new pastor, you talk with other moms, you read more books and you come to the conclusion that unless that author knows your child specifically and knows exactly how he/she will turn out then they can’t possibly know what your child needs. Same goes for all the moms you talk to.

I’ve come to learn that my children are as different as night and day. And praise God for it. Of course they are different, they should be different. I still have to remind myself of it daily as I try to love them the same way or discipline them the same way or pray the same things for them. They already have such different needs based on their personalities and physiology. I’ve since begun to celebrate their differences. From those differences will come the gifts God has equipped them with and then the road he will have them travel on should they choose to follow Him. -This I prayed about regularly until finally I learned that it is in God’s hands and I have to trust that he will take care of all that.

I am continuing to learn about myself as a mom, a wife, a friend. I thought I knew myself inside and out, I mean who knows you better than you?

God does.

I was reading through Ephesians tonight, as Pastor Stef has been leading us through this amazing work of Paul, and came to understand even deeper how we each are so different and how that should be respected.

“For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do” Eph 2:10

My children are often pushing and pulling, jostling for position, sometimes it’s for a toy, sometimes to get on my lap. As they grow older the jostling will probably become more aggressive, and sadly probably won’t be to sit with mommy. What I am learning from them is not only how best to “referee” their situation but also to examine my own actions when it comes to how I treat my brothers and sisters in Christ. Am I fighting for that silly toy? Or am I just trying to get closer to God’s lap?

Reading that verse again... it really levels the playing field. Sure we each are different, with different gifts but no one of us is more important than the other. God created each of us... all of us to do good works, to honour HIM to glorify HIM, to praise HIM....

You know, I knew this already.... I just never followed the thought all the way. From the one and only book where the author knows how it started and how it will end.

Still learning...

God know's where we are right now...

I was driving my son to school yesterday and he piped up from the back seat... "Mom... God knows where we are right now." A simple statement? As we continued to drive I could tell the wheels in his head were turning, subsequently the wheels in my head were turning. The point being that God knows where we are even when we are going 60 km an hour.

Lately my life seems to be travelling at that pace. Probably slightly over the speed limit. Too fast... but just slow enough that I can stay in control... most of the time.

I began to reflect on the business of life and my struggle to fit in personal devotional time on a daily basis. What my son said (along with a little prompting of the Holy Spirit I'm sure) turned on a light bulb for me. I have been scheduling God into my calendar along with and unending list of things that need to get done. School, Bible Study, Lunch, Appointments, Dinner, this meeting, that meeting, story time, bed time.... God. My light bulb moment for the week was this: Stop trying to schedule a time slot for God. Not that I don't need to make sure I am spending time in prayer, reading and studying scripture and going to church but there is something I've been missing in the business that is my life. God needs to be part of everything else too.

Choices, choices...

Do you ever have a time when a song pops into your head, sometimes it’s the whole song, sometimes just the chorus but now that it’s in there rattling around you can’t get it out. Then you try to figure out how it got in there in the first place and how can you now get rid of it?

I had that this past Sunday. We were on our way to church and a song I hadn’t sung since I was a child popped in. I heard it with all the echoes and it just kept going, over and over.... so I shared the frustration and told my husband. He laughed and nodded his head in understanding, then, 30 seconds later he says, “thanks, now it’s in my head” (mission accomplished).

At first I was trying to figure out if I was remembering the song right, then I was tired of hearing it, then I started listening to it and taking it in. I concluded it was God who put it there. Last Sunday was September 11, 10 years since the horrible tragedies that struck America, but also my parent’s anniversary. The little boy that had been abducted from his home in Sparwood 3 days earlier had been returned seemingly unharmed. And my child had just had his 3^rd meltdown of the morning. The sun was shining but my husband and I were exhausted from a poor night’s sleep.

    This is the day (this is the day)

    That the Lord has made (that the Lord has made)

    We will rejoice (we will rejoice)

    And be glad in it (and be glad in it)....

Pick a day in your life, any day; good, bad, great, devastating and God made that day. That isn’t necessarily the most pleasant thought is it?

“You mean to say that the pain of that day was God’s doing?” (What about the joy?)

If you truly believe in the Sovereignty of our Lord then you have to accept that His hand is in everything that happens. He made this day just as He created this earth and us to be perfect. Sadly we, as fallible humans, managed screw it up somehow with the freedom of choice that He gave us. I think to get the most out of the day He’s made we have to take it back to Him.

Do you start your day thanking God for the day and for the opportunities that will come your way to give Him glory? Or do you start the day hoping you’ll just make it to bedtime without losing your marbles? And when you get into bed at night do you look back on the day and thank Him for His grace and mercies or do you close your eyes and hope to forget that moment when you yelled at your husband (and hope he forgets it too)

Choices, choices....

What is simultaneously the worst and best day in human history?

Psalm 118: 22-24

Road Trip

Have you ever packed up your children... stuffed them all in the Caravan... added the suitcases, strollers, booster seats, and playpens and then taken off on a road trip? Chances are you have! A road trip with a car full of little ones is always an adventure, no matter the destination. Now have you ever braved such an adventure without "Dad" in the driver seat? Maybe you haven't packed up and gone on a trip without the Father of your children... maybe he's had to go away on a business trip... maybe he works long hours or does shift work or maybe he's had to be away for any number of reasons. Now the "Adventure" part of the day takes on a whole new level!

In my time as a mother I have often chosen for one reason or another to brave such an adventure on my own. Other times I have had no choice but to go about it alone and I've noticed that no matter why it is that "Daddy's" not around for an evening, a weekend, a whole week or (Lord help me) longer chaos starts to reign! The kids get grumpy, and I get grumpy. Simple tasks become complicated and difficult. The whole balancing act gets thrown off. Mealtime, bedtime, discipline, and everything else just aren't the same when Dad isn't there for an extended period of time.

During my last road trip adventure without my husband I was thinking about how everything was getting out of hand. I thought about how things often go wrong when I am on my own, even if I have family and friends helping out. The child who eats everything is all of a sudden picky... the perfect sleeper won't go to bed... and Mr. Manners has just discovered a new word that isn't so polite! Then I started to think about this from a spiritual perspective. Times when I have been away from my Heavenly Father for far too long. Days when I start without HIM. Even moments when I've turned away because I've thought for some reason that I can do it by myself (now I am sounding like my 2 year old)!

Chances are during the time God has blessed us with little ones at our feet we will face times when we feel very alone. I would encourage you in these times (and all the time) to stay close to Our Father, God. I know that the mornings I begin with a prayer start off so much better. Prayer doesn't stop the milk from being spilt but it sure does something to my spirit to keep me calm as I am cleaning up the mess for the 3rd time already! I'm a very busy mom but times is a funny thing and I believe that God blesses us with more time when we make time for Him.

Motherhood is an adventure... may God be your strength in your adventure today!

Psalm 73:23-26

Yet I am always with you;
you hold me by my right hand.
You guide me with your counsel,
and afterward you will take me into glory.
Whom have I in heaven but you?
And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart
and my portion forever.