I have been challenged by this question for as long as I can
remember. The youngest in the family, I was identified either by my parents or
older siblings and now that I’m married and a mom, I am identified by my
husband and children. To be completely honest I don’t have a problem with that,
I adore my husband and children. I just struggle to establish who I am in the
midst of those connections and to be happy with that identity.
It is a challenge to get away from those connections being
your only identity. It makes me think of the Old Testament where this person
begat that person and they begat and they begat. The lineage goes back for
generations upon generations, and while one’s character begins from the raising
up received by one’s parents that is not who that person is. If you read
further you see that they are then identified or defined by the character that
is revealed of them through the challenges they are faced with and the choices
they make. (Psalm 139:13) God knits that character into us from the moment we were
conceived. He knows the challenges and joys we will face. He has prepared us,
given us the equipment we need to endure, we need only to ask Him for the key
to unlock the shed that holds the equipment. Then we need to ask Him to teach
us how to use it.
As a mom my days go by so fast that I barely have time to get
a shower in before lunch. So often I spend my day feeling like I’m just trying
to catch up. I have access to the shed, the doors are open and I pull out the
equipment I’m familiar with and know how to use but often it is the wrong tool
for the job. I have found that the more I seek God to help me know myself the
better wife and mom I am. I become more aware of my own strengths and
weaknesses. The character you display directly affects the character of your
child or children. If you are someone who constantly worries would you be
surprised if your child has difficulty trusting?
Try to keep the distinction between “who” and “what”. The
answer to “Who” you are should be completely different from the answer for
“What” you are.
“What are you?” I’ll give you my answer it might be very
similar to yours. “I am a woman. I am a wife, a mom, a daughter....” I’m sure
from there our answers may differ. Now I want you to answer, “Who are you?” I’m not giving you my answer for this one.
This is for you to figure out, write it down or speak it out loud.
So, “Who are you?” It is a seemingly innocuous question. I
am (insert your name here) that should be it, end of story.
Can you identify your own character? What makes you a
blessing to your husband, children, friends, church, community… what is it
about you that brings glory to God?
I think ultimately that should be the path we take in
discovering who we each are. What equipment has God given me? Have I put myself
out there so He has to show me how to use it? When I do end up using it, is it
all to His glory? That is when you know who you are. And in discovering that,
ironically you’ll learn that no matter how well you know yourself, He knows you
better.
Over this last year we have explored the blessings of
encouragement through this blog. Moms have posted about their challenges, and
victories. In each posting a little bit of the character of a woman of God has
been revealed. I have learned much about myself this past year as I
occasionally contributed to the M.O.M. blog and that has been an unexpected and
pleasant side effect. When we started it up last September the biggest purpose
was to create a community online in which some moms could share their unique
struggles or encouragement to the other moms at Bethany. I hope it has done
that. I hope and pray that the blog posts over this past year have been an
encouragement to whoever has read them. I pray that those readers have been
blessed and challenged to strive forward in their own walks with the Lord and
their families.
Ephesians 4
